Sometimes I wonder if they’re all alike. people. life. and love. My friends point out that I get greedy sometimes, wanting something I don’t have. I guess when I heard that, I was a bit ashamed. It didn’t surprise me that people thought of me that way. But hearing the word “greedy” still felt like something I should be ashamed of, as if I’m programmed to feel that way about the word.
But I’m not so sure if I should feel ashamed after all. What is so wrong about wanting something I don’t have yet? I love the word “yet.” It fills life with endless possibilities. And assuming I’d live until I have reached the average mortality rate in this country, I have not even lived a third of my entire lifetime. I am still young, and I love “yet.” I love the fact that I’m young and love the fact that my life still has possibilities. And I accept and love the fact that I’m greedy.
Some people at my age are already happy with what they have and settle down. I respect and envy those who can honestly say that they are happy. Wow, that’s something I could never do, at least not now.
But some live life without passion and end up waking up, thirty-something and unsatisfied. Some try buying expensive cars, some travel around the world. Some give up and live on, thinking, well, c’est la vie.
I think differently about my life. I’m not in any position to talk about other people’s lives. But at least for my life, I want all the things I could possibly have. Settling down is something I’d do later in life. I don’t mind too much that I’m not fully happy right now. That is not my goal right now. If I could look back and think, yes i lived a happy life on my last breath, some greed, some stress don’t matter too much. Desire, possbilities, ideals. C’est MA vie.