This is so amazing.
My adored star Catherine Zeta Jones’s husband Michael Douglas is an UCSB alumni!! HAHAHA it’s so great. I just read in the Daily Nexus (School newspaper) that he just donated a million dollars to the Drama Department. The only places with donation seem like the engineering, physics, and the drama department. They have the most fabulous looking buildings for their classes. Damn, no one does anything for the political science.

I want to say thank-you to all those friends who left notes, called me on the phone to cheer me up.. I just blew up last night because my mom and I are slowly realizing what we’re getting into. It’s quite scary. I really don’t want my parents to sacrifice themselves like that. They worked hard enough all these years and I really do think that they deserve a better retirement years. Some of my friends’ parents retired already and enjoy their lives with their families. My dad is 60 next year and he still works because he has to support us.

If my sister goes to Korea, that means we’ll never be able to see each other every day. Mom and suzanne in korea, me in santa barbara, dad in orange county, or wherever he gets his job in the future. My parents are so old already and my family living all over the world like this. I really don’t want that. It should be us who take care of mom and dad now. My sister made it pretty clear that she doesn’t want any more parental intervention. She says she can make it on her own. I just simply stopped caring about her or loving her. Actually I hate her like my oldest enemy. For hurting MY parents. MY family. I’m going to do everything possible to send her away to Korea. That’s what she wants and that’s what I want too. I don’t want to see her. She disgusts me. She’s ruining everyone’s lives for her selfishness. I hate her to death.

Ah well. I feel so much better after writing in xanga and after talking to so many friends about this. I guess they can’t completely understand though they truly care about me. But that’s okay. I really appreciate everyone’s concern. They don’t want to see us fighting like this I know. Because Suzanne and I have been the closest friends of each other. But my rules on friendship cannot be an exception here. I can’t be friends with someone who is immature and irresponsible. I dont’ care if that person’s my parents, my sister, or my best friend. I just can’t keep a healthy relationship with anyone who’s selfish and irresponsible. They not only hurt themselves, they hurt everyone else around them. I refuse to be around her.


x. name : Jean Chung
x. birthday : 11.o7.84
x. piercings : 2
x. tattoos : none
x. height :  5’4
x. shoe size : 7 1/2
x. hair color : Dark brown
x. length : Little below my shoulders. my hair grows so fast
x. pets : None but I WANT A PUPPY. 

x. movie you rented : Chicago, over the summer, just cuz I was bored.
x. movie you bought : I just download them keke. or ask Mike to. Thirteen.
x. song you listened to : Christina Aguilera–Stripped or Bi–2nd album
x. song you had stuck in your head : Britney Spears–Toxic
x. song you’ve downloaded : Korean songs.
x. person you’ve called : Mom
x. person that called you : Mike
x. tv show you’ve watched : Sex and the City.. So sad there’s just 3 episodes left.
x. person you were thinking of : my roommate, Grace.

x. you have a bf or gf  : Yes~
x. you have a crush on someone : Not right now. Wait, yes, Bi. kekekeke
x. you wish you could live somewhere else: YES. Like DOWNTOWN.
x. you think about suicide : Not now. I’m happy.
x. you believe in online dating : It may work for some people; not me. 
x. others find you attractive : I believe so. I want to believe so.What a silly/embarrassing question.
x. you want more piercings : mayby few more ear piercings and belly.
x. you want more tattoos : I do find them sexy but I’m too scared to get one.
x. you drink : Just socially. And I don’t have a social life. Maybe once every six months.
x. you do drugs : Nope never. Don’t believe in ti.
x. you like cleaning : Obssesive-Compulsive. Enough said.

for or against…
x. long distance relationships : Against
x. using someone : Well.. depends.
x. suicide : If you’re that unhappy, for. But life is beautiful, why end it?
x. killing people : Against.. Again, STUPID QUESTION.
x. teenage smoking : Against before 18 yrs old. Trust me, you’ll regret it.
x. doing drugs : Against. If you’re unhappy, better kill yourself than doing illegal stuff.
x. sex : For, if you can be responsible.
x. driving drunk : Against, if you’re unhappy, go kill yourself and don’t kill anyone else.
x. gay/lesbian relationships : For.  

x. food : Pasta, Salad, Sushi.
x. thing to do : Dance, Write, Sing, Driving when it’s sunny outside.
x. thing to talk about : Politics
x. sports : Swimming and Golfing.
x. clothes : Something sophisticated. Black suits. I love love love skirts. Something classy but sexy.
x. movies : American History X
x. holiday :  Christmas.. but it’s so cold!
x. car : ANything but camry/accord. Too common. I want something original.

have you ever…
x. ever cried over a girl/ boy : Never. Not worth it.
x. ever lied to someone : Yes. Many times. To save my own butt.
x. ever been in a fist fight / arrested : Nope. I dont do anything that’ll get me in trouble.
x. ran away: Nope, but i was tempted to.
x. been in love: Yes, definitely. Love matures people.
x. broke a bone: SO MANY TIMES. ew.
x. said i love you and meant it: Yes.
x. Fallen for your best friend?: Yes, actually I dont really date people I dont know well.
x. Made out w/ JUST a friend?:  Yes. FUn fun.
x. Been rejected? Nope, I dont try unless I’m sure.
x. Been in love?: Hey same question! Yes.
x. Been in lust?: Yes
x. Been used?: No, I would beat them up.
x. Been cheated on? No, I break their hearts before they could do this to me.
x. Been kissed?: Yes.

x. shampoo do you use : Different one every month. Panteen, St. Ives, Thermasilk, etc.
x. cologne/purfume do you use : Gap Blue No. 655 (they’re out of it damn it), Chanel Allure, Chance, Guess, Oxyene. 
x. are you scared of : Bugs. Big animals.

x. of times I have had my heart broken? : Zero.
x. of hearts I have broken? : I don’t know; i don’t care.
x. of boys I have kissed? : Six.
x. of girls I have kissed? : Platonically, hm. Two.
x. of continents I have lived in? : Two
x. of drugs taken illegally? : None. Hmm maybe diet pills without recommendation. keke
x. of people I would classify as true, could trust with my life : Two.
x. of people from high school that I stayed in contact with? : 10? 15? not sure.
x. of cd’s that I own? : Too many, can’t count.
x. of scars on my body? : Just one on my ankle.
x. of things in my past that I regret? : Nothing.

x. see: peanut butter
x. fear: Roaches
x. smell: my perfume.
x. hate: Some family members in Korea.
x. find: a new apartment to live next year.
x. have: to go to work soon.
x. feel: Calm, normal, kinda depressed.
x. wonder: aBouT how my paper would turn out on Thursday.
x. wish: I could live in a nice nice apartment next year.
x. miss: Home~
x. need: to stop eating so much!
x. love: sunny days in Santa Barbara, Books I adore.


2 thoughts on “

  1. hey jean. everything will be okay in the end. your parents are so lucky to have you as their daughter…so understanding, always thinking about what’s best for your family:)
    interesting answers.

  2. hey wuz~ i’m sorry about your problems.. and i wish for you that it works out for the best.  Just thought a little “roiwuzpiquer” might cheer you up a little. =)

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